Confession is good for the soul.

Today I attended the wedding of a close friend’s daughter. How romantic and reassuring it was to see two young people declare their undying love and faithfulness to each other. The ceremony was charming and the reception was lively. Upon entering the reception hall I immediately spotted an old friend that I had once adored, but thought was forever gone from my life. I tried to hide the sparkle in my eye, but the flutter in my heart was overwhelming. How long had it been since we were last together? Two years? Five years? Ten years? I felt this rush and an incredible tension build up inside me. Was I actually lusting? As I made my way across the room, the little voice in my head told me, “No, don’t do it. Sure it might be pleasurable now, but you will regret this later.” But did I listen? No. I gave in to my urges with a very willing subject. Today I was weak. And tonight I am so ashamed. I’ve been very critical of others who have given in to their momentary lapses of good judgment. Now I am one of them. But this afternoon I guess I just got caught up in the moment, what with the crowd and the excitement. All I could think was how chances like this don’t come often in one’s lifetime, and if I don’t do this now, the chance might never come again. It would be quick and it would be so fulfilling. No one would ever have to find out. And I did it. I gave in to all those old emotions. I cheated. Now, hours later, I am living in the miserable reality that being a cheater brings. I literally feel sick. I can’t even look my husband in the eye. All I can say is, “As God is my witness, I will never eat wedding cake again.”